Blog Archives

What goes out comes in

Naran

Our contradictory behaviors – Home vs. Work

We will keep criticizing people at home for small things, while we tolerate more in the work place.

On the contrary, when an assistant asks for small things, you may reject it using office procedures as an excuse. Though at home, you might prefer to say yes for whatever your wife asks for.

You may reject somebody and dislike somebody else. The same dislike will operate against you in some other place. Somebody else will reject you or dislike you.

She got into some problem in her office

Anjali was blamed for something she didn’t do, saying that the work comes under her jurisdiction. Whatever explanation she wanted to give was not accepted, even though she is an honest worker.

Then why this should happen to her?

I asked her whether she had rejected someone close to her. She said all along she treated her husband like dirt. I told her when she changes her attitude toward him, her office situation will become alright and it did.

When you are rejecting a person with no reason, then you will be rejected unnecessarily in some other place. If you constantly find fault with somebody then you will be criticised by somebody else. This is a mental cycle.

Abusing somebody who had asked for a donation

If you had insulted somebody unnecessarily then you will be insulted unnecessarily.

Somebody wanted a donation from Arun for charity purpose. He rejected him giving not only flimsy reasons but also criticised him vehemently. Later, after two years, he was charged by custom authorities and asked him to pay more.

We do not observe life at all. The person who came for donation was wounded. Now Arun is wounded. This is law of life.

Therefore, whatever you do, release you desire, emotions behind it and then do it.

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Do this! Problems will be solved automatically!!

Naran

Desire for approval in action

You can list the ways you seek desire for approval:

  • Thank you for your appreciation
  • I don’t want to hurt his feelings
  • I should not reject him
  • If I do this, he will be happy
  • If I do this, he will not get angry

In addition, list the ways by which you allow yourself to be controlled by others or control others – Desire for approval.

You can term it as fear of rejection or disapproval, for example to influence others through Batch Flower Remedies (list this item too).

We have so much desire to control others and events. We use Bach Flower remedies either with a desire to change ourselves or others.

70% of the time we are operating with this desire and may be more, but not less. If we release this desire, most of the problems will be solved by itself!!

Does a person control you?

Naran

He is controlling me. If you think A is trying to control you, then it means you have fear of being controlled.

  • Release the fear of being controlled

Can you release the fear to be controlled?

Why A is controlling you? It is because you have the fear of being controlled.

  • Before releasing the fear welcome it and then accept it.

Whenever he controls you, are you resisting him?

  • Accept your resistance to him and release it.

Do you like to change him?

  • If yes, can you release the desire to change him?

What do you dislike in him?

  • Can you let go this dislike?

You may ask a different question.

What is that you disapprove, or reject/dislike in him?

Can you accept him as he is? If you get “No” then continue the exercise. You will not get an immediate yes, as you have dislikes for him.

Does this person cause fear in you? What will happen if you are standing in front of him? Is there is any feeling of insecurity?

  • Release your feelings of insecurity.
  • Release your feelings of him.

What do you think will happen if you are in front of him? Do you want this fear to happen?  If no, then release it.

  • Can you release this wanting to happen?
  • Release your fear.

How do you protect yourself? Do you show your anger? Do you resist him? Alternatively, do you have the desire to separate from him or go away from him?

  • Release all those desires.

Can you now accept the person as he is? If you get ‘No”, then continue the exercise. Can you have trust in him? Does anyone think that he or she cannot accept him as he is?

Please understand, if you cannot accept him, then he will continue to be in these types of situations. If you do not want to quarrel or lose harmony, you can nullify the charge of emotions by accepting him as he is.

Related Blog

I love to take control of my life: http://wp.me/ptUMq-4D

Magic mantra – every day, week and month

RD

Referring the article: https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/03/02/moving-to-a-new-location/

I am amazed reading this, as today I was reading old articles of 2009. I was filled with eagerness to learn more and regret that I “wasted” my last four years.

Then I started repeating:

  • “I release my desire to learn more”,
  • “I release regrets of the past”
  • “I accept the present”.

Soon my frame of mind was positive and cheerful again!!

This is a magic mantra. All day now, I repeat this for all things! And finding myself closer and closer to the person I was – before all the stressful life events (happened to me).

From RULE your MIND Workshop notes

1. Release the emotions you felt during the day

Do this exercise for all of them – taking one emotion at a time. Even if it is a positive feeling, release that. Find out the state of the mind and do the steps:

  • “I welcome this state”,
  • “I accept it”
  • “Can I release that?”

Even if it is a negative emotion (or feeling) like anger, you release it.

Whatever that does not go, write it in a notebook and continue to work on it, until it goes.

2. Release emotions felt during the last one week

What are the predominant emotions you had? During last seven days what incidents happened? What emotions you felt?

Welcome each one of them, accept them and release them by keep saying,” I release, I release”.

3. Repeat the exercise for last one month

Are you able to remember any emotions? Are there are any emotion still persisting? When I say emotions, I mean not just negative emotions but also positive emotions.

Likes and Dislikes

Naran

How liking for a person operates inside the mind?

Take one person what you like about him and what you don’t like about him, say your spouse for example.

You have a liking for the person. What is the desire operating behind this like?

For some reason you like him. Whoever listens to us we like them. If somebody argues with us, even if they tell the truth we don’t like them.

Therefore, when we like somebody we have to like him for some reason. It could be based on desire for approval or desire to associate.

  • Therefore, shall we say, ‘I release my desire to like him’.

Because we have desire to possess, when that person is around, we feel happy.

When they go away from us, then we do not feel happy and start hating that person.

Did you release the liking for that person? We are not sure, so we are not releasing it.

When you release your likes about a person, everything will go on well between you and the concerned person. Love will get stronger.

  • Release all your likes and dislike for the same person.

How does dislike operates?

If they are like this, then I am happy about them. Thus, a desire to control or change the person operates here.

  • Therefore, welcome your dislike and release your dislike.
  • Then accept your desire to control and release it as well.

Fighting for Happiness and Success

ALAMELU

As you said do not resist allow things to happen!!

How cannot we resist – myself verge of losing job – hubby not yet got job – severe mental stress killing me very badly. How I allow myself not to feel stressed. Please let me know?

Naran

When you are on the verge of losing the job, will your worry or fear get the job back?

If so, have fear and worry.

Your fear and worry or anger is what is known as Resistance.

When you accept what is happening, you may see and utilize other avenues.

A message is received (from the incident why you lost the job).

Instead of being overtaken by the rush of emotions and thoughts, and becoming judgmental about what is happening (which is of no use), go within and watch your reaction.

Say, Yes I accept this emotion. I release this.

Go on releasing whatever thought comes to your mind.

After sometime, analyze why this emotion or these types of thoughts come.

Ask yourself is it because of your desire to change the event?

If the answer is yes, say, I release my desire to control or change what is happening.

Ask another question.

Are all the emotions because of fear?

Whatever we fear will manifest.

Say, releasing this fear, I release my desire for security.

Then when the mind is almost clear of restlessness, start chanting “I accept whatever happens totally”.

Check out the “RELEASE your RESISTANCE” CD, which will help you to release your resistance to find happiness and success in life: http://naranhealingproducts.wordpress.com/2013/04/10/release-your-resistance-cd/

Managing a stubborn person

Student

My son has a resistance to work. He will go late to office. He was warned three times.

One day he decides to go to office in casual wear. Even though I warned him, he didn’t want to listen to me.

Then, I decided to affirm, ‘I release my desire to change or control him’.

Naran

You have affirmed correctly. Please do it as many times as you can.

On and off our mind will not keep quiet. So we need to release our desire to control or change somebody.

Moving to a new location

Let us say, you want to come to Chennai.

Release your likes about Chennai then only you can come to Chennai.

  • I release my likes for Chennai.

I like Chennai because of my liking to Hotel Saravana Bavan and Marina Beach in Chennai.

I accept my liking for Chennai.

Then, I release my liking for Chennai.

  • I release my dislikes for Chennai.

I dislike Chennai, because of auto drivers, and it is very dirty.

What’s the desire that operates here?

There is a desire to control and to change it. For example, we say, ‘If I am given power, I will change it in no time’.

Here, we are only releasing the desires (or dislikes).

Likewise you can do the same when you are moving to a foreign country.

Release both your likes and dislikes related about a situation you wanted to change.

Failed to change my child’s behaviour

You want to control your child’s behavior. Instead of studying, he is watching the TV all the time.

  • First say, “I release my desire to control him”. Then advise him.

Why? If you tell him anything with judgment, then he will never listen to you for sure.

How do we control our children? They have to be punctual, eat healthy, study well etc.

Thus, we control all their activities because we think they are to be corrected. We don’t allow them to grow in their own way.

  • What will happen if we don’t tell them so?

If I don’t tell him then he won’t go to school.

  • There is a fear he won’t go to school.
  • So I release the fear that he won’t go to school.
  • What will happen if he doesn’t go to school? Nothing will happen.

I have a responsibility as a mother. Other people should say that my child is a good child.

  • Say, “I release my desire for approval”.
  • In addition, say, “I release my desire to control him”.
  • Release all the desires and then discipline him.
  • There are three basic desires that are operating within us – desire to control, desire to get approval and desire for security.

Even if I wake him up, he doesn’t get up.

  • How do you exercise your control with him? By getting angry with him, you are exercising your control over him.
  • Release that.
  • What’s that you don’t like about him? You dislike him because he is getting up late.
  • Release your dislikes about him.

He doesn’t behave as per my expectations. If he gets up on time then he will be no 1 student

  • This is your expectation.
  • Release all your expectations about him  and then you discipline him

Each and every matter you need to analyze like this and then take your actions. 

One door closes Another door opens

Tanu

I and my boy-friend broke up last year though we love each other even now.

It all happened because of his friends as they cropped up misunderstandings between us. And he isn’t able to see that.

And I know he doesn’t have that much of courage to tell me that he still loves me. I really want to get back together with him.

Naran

Leave him!!!

Tanu

Then please suggest me something so that I forget him easily as I am trying to get over him. But, as we work at the same place, it’s really difficult for me to see him every time everywhere around me and that turns me off.

And I am full of sad feelings.

Or tell me how I can get my real soul mate.

Naran

I could understand your pangs of love.

Only for your highest good I suggested that.

I honestly feel that you should lead a happy life.

Can everybody be happy?

One has to learn to be happy in spite of events.

When we want something intently, and when we resist what is happening then what we get is pain. Though we want pleasure, our resistance to any event and our incomplete understanding of the divine order, gives us pain only.

Just observe what is going on in the mind.

  • As and when any thought come, just say, “Why not I release this? Yes, I let go of this thought?”
  • Release everything – every feeling, every thought – that prevents you to forget him.
  • If any thought or feeling does not get released, find out the desire behind this feeling or thought. If there is a desire to possess him release that desire.
  • If there is a desire to change him or the event release that desire too.

Do the releasing techniques as given above.

Other steps

If you can buy Bach flower remedies from your local homeopathy shop then buy:

  • CHICORY (to overcome the love pangs)
  • WALNUT (to release resistance and break away )
  • WILLOW (to overcome resentment and anger towards friends)
  • HORNBEAM (to move on)

Take those flower remedies by putting 6 pills of each in a bottle of water and keep on sipping that water from morning to evening.

Do this sipping for 15 days.

Put the pills once every day.

 

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