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What goes out comes in

Naran

Our contradictory behaviors – Home vs. Work

We will keep criticizing people at home for small things, while we tolerate more in the work place.

On the contrary, when an assistant asks for small things, you may reject it using office procedures as an excuse. Though at home, you might prefer to say yes for whatever your wife asks for.

You may reject somebody and dislike somebody else. The same dislike will operate against you in some other place. Somebody else will reject you or dislike you.

She got into some problem in her office

Anjali was blamed for something she didn’t do, saying that the work comes under her jurisdiction. Whatever explanation she wanted to give was not accepted, even though she is an honest worker.

Then why this should happen to her?

I asked her whether she had rejected someone close to her. She said all along she treated her husband like dirt. I told her when she changes her attitude toward him, her office situation will become alright and it did.

When you are rejecting a person with no reason, then you will be rejected unnecessarily in some other place. If you constantly find fault with somebody then you will be criticised by somebody else. This is a mental cycle.

Abusing somebody who had asked for a donation

If you had insulted somebody unnecessarily then you will be insulted unnecessarily.

Somebody wanted a donation from Arun for charity purpose. He rejected him giving not only flimsy reasons but also criticised him vehemently. Later, after two years, he was charged by custom authorities and asked him to pay more.

We do not observe life at all. The person who came for donation was wounded. Now Arun is wounded. This is law of life.

Therefore, whatever you do, release you desire, emotions behind it and then do it.

Does a person control you?

Naran

He is controlling me. If you think A is trying to control you, then it means you have fear of being controlled.

  • Release the fear of being controlled

Can you release the fear to be controlled?

Why A is controlling you? It is because you have the fear of being controlled.

  • Before releasing the fear welcome it and then accept it.

Whenever he controls you, are you resisting him?

  • Accept your resistance to him and release it.

Do you like to change him?

  • If yes, can you release the desire to change him?

What do you dislike in him?

  • Can you let go this dislike?

You may ask a different question.

What is that you disapprove, or reject/dislike in him?

Can you accept him as he is? If you get “No” then continue the exercise. You will not get an immediate yes, as you have dislikes for him.

Does this person cause fear in you? What will happen if you are standing in front of him? Is there is any feeling of insecurity?

  • Release your feelings of insecurity.
  • Release your feelings of him.

What do you think will happen if you are in front of him? Do you want this fear to happen?  If no, then release it.

  • Can you release this wanting to happen?
  • Release your fear.

How do you protect yourself? Do you show your anger? Do you resist him? Alternatively, do you have the desire to separate from him or go away from him?

  • Release all those desires.

Can you now accept the person as he is? If you get ‘No”, then continue the exercise. Can you have trust in him? Does anyone think that he or she cannot accept him as he is?

Please understand, if you cannot accept him, then he will continue to be in these types of situations. If you do not want to quarrel or lose harmony, you can nullify the charge of emotions by accepting him as he is.

Related Blog

I love to take control of my life: http://wp.me/ptUMq-4D

NLP for accepting a bad relationship

Naran

Brain is the hardware of the mind. The brain always stores memories of the people we like, in one compartment, and the people we do not like in another compartment.

At the same time, we come across people who are neutral to us, to whom we have no likes or dislikes. They do not have a participation in our life. They will be kept in a different compartment of the brain.

Remove the dislike for the person

  • Visualize a white screen in front of you.
  • Close your eyes. Use your hands and do it.
  • Where is the person whom you like? They will be in one place.
  • Find out where the person you dislike are stored inside your brain. You will get a feeling in some part of your brain.
  • Find out where neutral compartment people are.
  • Move the person you dislike to neutral place.

Repeat the exercise over a few days or weeks until you can release the dislike for the person disliked.

Do the releasing first

Do not do this without doing the releasing technique first as you should know how much your feelings and desires are responsible for disharmony caused.

Automatically, the other person you hate will go from you.  Even if he is present, you will not be afraid that he can control you. He will not be in your life to control you anymore.

Therefore, you can concentrate on something else. The NLP exercise will reduce our dislikes, but we have to release first.  Do this on a daily basis.

We should remove our arrogance, feelings and our demanding nature. If you don’t expect positive feelings of release, then do the NLP technique

Why did I select the third compartment?

One can accept the person totally after doing releasing techniques. There is no doubt about that.

Though, if we see that person again, we won’t know what to do. If we put them in a neutral compartment, then we will accept them easily.  Therefore, you should not give up on ‘RULE your MIND’ techniques.

Neutral compartment will help us in accepting a person.

Related blogs

There is no Second Chance in Marriage: http://wp.me/ptUoU-1j

The Driver for Relationships: http://wp.me/ptUHD-3E

Failed to change my child’s behaviour

You want to control your child’s behavior. Instead of studying, he is watching the TV all the time.

  • First say, “I release my desire to control him”. Then advise him.

Why? If you tell him anything with judgment, then he will never listen to you for sure.

How do we control our children? They have to be punctual, eat healthy, study well etc.

Thus, we control all their activities because we think they are to be corrected. We don’t allow them to grow in their own way.

  • What will happen if we don’t tell them so?

If I don’t tell him then he won’t go to school.

  • There is a fear he won’t go to school.
  • So I release the fear that he won’t go to school.
  • What will happen if he doesn’t go to school? Nothing will happen.

I have a responsibility as a mother. Other people should say that my child is a good child.

  • Say, “I release my desire for approval”.
  • In addition, say, “I release my desire to control him”.
  • Release all the desires and then discipline him.
  • There are three basic desires that are operating within us – desire to control, desire to get approval and desire for security.

Even if I wake him up, he doesn’t get up.

  • How do you exercise your control with him? By getting angry with him, you are exercising your control over him.
  • Release that.
  • What’s that you don’t like about him? You dislike him because he is getting up late.
  • Release your dislikes about him.

He doesn’t behave as per my expectations. If he gets up on time then he will be no 1 student

  • This is your expectation.
  • Release all your expectations about him  and then you discipline him

Each and every matter you need to analyze like this and then take your actions. 

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