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Does a person control you?

Naran

He is controlling me. If you think A is trying to control you, then it means you have fear of being controlled.

  • Release the fear of being controlled

Can you release the fear to be controlled?

Why A is controlling you? It is because you have the fear of being controlled.

  • Before releasing the fear welcome it and then accept it.

Whenever he controls you, are you resisting him?

  • Accept your resistance to him and release it.

Do you like to change him?

  • If yes, can you release the desire to change him?

What do you dislike in him?

  • Can you let go this dislike?

You may ask a different question.

What is that you disapprove, or reject/dislike in him?

Can you accept him as he is? If you get “No” then continue the exercise. You will not get an immediate yes, as you have dislikes for him.

Does this person cause fear in you? What will happen if you are standing in front of him? Is there is any feeling of insecurity?

  • Release your feelings of insecurity.
  • Release your feelings of him.

What do you think will happen if you are in front of him? Do you want this fear to happen?  If no, then release it.

  • Can you release this wanting to happen?
  • Release your fear.

How do you protect yourself? Do you show your anger? Do you resist him? Alternatively, do you have the desire to separate from him or go away from him?

  • Release all those desires.

Can you now accept the person as he is? If you get ‘No”, then continue the exercise. Can you have trust in him? Does anyone think that he or she cannot accept him as he is?

Please understand, if you cannot accept him, then he will continue to be in these types of situations. If you do not want to quarrel or lose harmony, you can nullify the charge of emotions by accepting him as he is.

Related Blog

I love to take control of my life: http://wp.me/ptUMq-4D

Rule your MIND! Rule your LIFE!!

STOP the MIND’s Influence on YOU Part IV

Read part I in the series:  https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/01/31/how-to-stop-the-mind-influencing-us-part-i/

Part II: “The need for Letting GO” – https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/02/07/the-need-for-letting-go/

Part III: “Letting GO in Action”https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/02/11/letting-go-in-action/

Your child is not studying

Letting go proves to be very difficult for the mother.  Between feelings/emotions and action there is no gap. So she gets angry and scolds him.

Then she will feel guilty and pamper him to appease him. During this process, the purpose of the son to study has been lost.

How to manage such a situation?

Whenever any emotion arises, ask the questions:

  • What are the thoughts?
  • What is the emotion behind the thought(s)?
  • I accept this thought
  • Can I release it?

By asking questions, you are creating a gap between thoughts and actions.

Will he study if I release the thought? He has not studied so far anyway.

Try this technique, release your anger and do the action. Then see the results for yourself whether he studies or not.

Why there are communication barriers between mother and son?

Emotions block the communication.

What is the communication required here? He has to listen to us for him to study.

There can be three types of desires here.

Desire to control or change the person

He has to study very hard. He has to become an Engineer and so on.

A framework is present here:

  • Release the thought one after another
  • Do I want to change this person/child?
  • If I say yes, can I release my desire to control the person?
  • We are only releasing the desire, and we are not releasing the action here.
  • I release my desire to control the person. Only then your anger will go.

Desire for more security – feeling of insecurity

Is there is any desire to feel more secure?

Only if he studies well he will do well and then I will become free.

Where there is fear there is no presence of Divinity. Only Satan is present.

I release my fear.

These desires are born with ego.

Desire for approval

Others should recognize my son’s talent. Others should appreciate us (by appreciating my son’s excellence in his studies). People have to complement us (how well you have brought him up).

Another example where a husband desires his wife should treat him properly when he comes home from office.

Release that desire.

What if she appreciates you or not? You let go the craving for recognition.

More and more you should indulge in releasing thoughts, like a game.

Rule your mind instead of mind ruling you

Now mind is managing your life.

Instead, manage it yourself.

Then you do not need a teacher. You do not need anybody.

Therefore, just let go all the thoughts.

What this technique can do

  • Achieving your goals. We are not saying no for achievement. We are only entitled for action and not fruits for the action.
  • Keep saying release and go beyond likes and dislikes.
  • Decision-making
  • Breaking bad habits
  • Better Health and Wealth
  • Good Relationships
  • Build better parent and children relationships
  • In your career you will be able to do wonders

In entire life, you can let go and release. Everything will happen without your intervention.

WATCH Out!

Your spouse may not react if you do the following…He will simply accept whatever you do…

Saroja: I feel guilty.

Naran: Why?

Saroja: For the last 12 months I have been saving Rs.100/ to present a watch to my brother. I have to give that without my husband knowing it.  My conscience pricks that I am doing something wrong.

Naran: Welcome the guilt feeling and release it.

  • I welcome this terrible guilt. I release this guilt.

Naran: Is it still there?

Saroja: Yes. More than guilt, fear is there.

Naran: What are the thoughts in your state of fear?

Saroja: If he comes to know I will be doomed. This thought is obsessing me.

Naran: Fearing something means unconsciously or secretly means that we want this to happen. Do you want your life to be doomed by your husband?

Saroja: No.

Naran: Then accept it and release it.

  • I release my wanting to be doomed.

Saroja: Sir, my fear is, if he comes to know, he will abuse me. I will be not allowed to see my parents and brother.

  • I accept that I want to be physically abused by my husband. I let go of this fear.
  •  In addition, I let go of my desire to be abused by my husband. 
  • I want to stop meeting my parents. I accept this desire and let go of my desire to stop meeting my parents.
  • I release my state of insecurity because I am safe.

Repeat.

Saroja: I feel better.  I feel comfortable.

Naran: Why do you want to present a watch to your brother on his birth day?

Saroja: I am happy to see him happy.

Naran: How do you know that your gift will make him happy?

Saroja: He does not have one.

Naran: Your gift will make him love you better.

Saroja: Yes. I want to feel loved by him. I need his love.

Naran: Accept your need and desire for his love and release.

  • I accept that I need his love and there is desire for his approval. I release my desire for his approval.

Repeat.

Will you be ready to tell your husband about this?

Saroja: No.

Naran: Release again you insecurity.

Saroja: There still some fear.

  • I release my insecurity.

Saroja: Instead of him coming to know about this, I think rather it is better for me to tell him.

On the day of the incident, she describes in her own words

My fear started increasing.  There was tension in the stomach.

  • I accept there is tension in the stomach.  I release my tension in the stomach.

My body was becoming heavy.

  • I accept my body is becoming heavy. I release the heaviness.

I am ok now.

  • I accept that I am ok. I release this okay feeling.
  • Will he shout at me if I tell him about the watch gift? Let go, let go.

Silence for a few seconds.

  • I can’t face his eyes. Let go, let go.

Some more silence.

  • How do I tell him? Let go, let go.

Silence again. I gave the cup of coffee to my husband. My hands become cold.

  • I accept my hands had become cold. I release the cold sensation in my hands.

My hands shivered.

  • I accept that I am shivering and I release this shivering sensation.
  • I release my state of insecurity (I repeat this affirmation few times).

Suddenly all my fears were gone and I became curious to know how he will react when I tell him about the watch gift. After taking the coffee, suddenly my husband asked me, “Your brother phoned up. It seems every year you buy him a gift. He asked me to remind you. What is your plan for this year?” “I am planning to buy him a watch”.

Lot of happiness joy enthusiasm fills me up.

  • I accept that I am joyful. I release my joy.

“That is a good idea. We will buy one. “I told him easily, “I have already saved Rs.1200/- towards that“. “Fantastic, then we will buy the watch today itself”.

When I went inside to change my dress there was joy and happiness.

  • I accept I am joyful. Can I release this joyful state? Yes.  I release my state of joy. I release my happiness.

When I released my feelings of joy, an aura of peace was there, which can’t be described in words.

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