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NLP for accepting a bad relationship

Naran

Brain is the hardware of the mind. The brain always stores memories of the people we like, in one compartment, and the people we do not like in another compartment.

At the same time, we come across people who are neutral to us, to whom we have no likes or dislikes. They do not have a participation in our life. They will be kept in a different compartment of the brain.

Remove the dislike for the person

  • Visualize a white screen in front of you.
  • Close your eyes. Use your hands and do it.
  • Where is the person whom you like? They will be in one place.
  • Find out where the person you dislike are stored inside your brain. You will get a feeling in some part of your brain.
  • Find out where neutral compartment people are.
  • Move the person you dislike to neutral place.

Repeat the exercise over a few days or weeks until you can release the dislike for the person disliked.

Do the releasing first

Do not do this without doing the releasing technique first as you should know how much your feelings and desires are responsible for disharmony caused.

Automatically, the other person you hate will go from you.  Even if he is present, you will not be afraid that he can control you. He will not be in your life to control you anymore.

Therefore, you can concentrate on something else. The NLP exercise will reduce our dislikes, but we have to release first.  Do this on a daily basis.

We should remove our arrogance, feelings and our demanding nature. If you don’t expect positive feelings of release, then do the NLP technique

Why did I select the third compartment?

One can accept the person totally after doing releasing techniques. There is no doubt about that.

Though, if we see that person again, we won’t know what to do. If we put them in a neutral compartment, then we will accept them easily.  Therefore, you should not give up on ‘RULE your MIND’ techniques.

Neutral compartment will help us in accepting a person.

Related blogs

There is no Second Chance in Marriage: http://wp.me/ptUoU-1j

The Driver for Relationships: http://wp.me/ptUHD-3E

Do you know why you react negatively?

Naran

Even though you are successful in your career…!!!

By nature, you are pure – positive, fearless, loving etc. In that sense, all of us are united at a level – called as Sub-conscious Mind or Universal Mind, where we have access to this positive energy.

At this level we are perfect, can do anything we want and be anything we would like to be.

However, we bring in the energy of negativity from outside. Thus, fear, anger, hatred etc., comes from outside and not inside us.

Then, how to get rid of the part that you don’t want?

Affirm:

“I RELEASE the part that produces anger”.

“I OPEN and ALIGN WITH the part that activates love, and forgiveness”.

Attend the workshop on 19th Oct, to know more about your shadow self: http://wp.me/p31KXo-1Y

TRAIN your MIND

Read the first part here: http://healbyeft.wordpress.com/2012/12/07/learning-the-art-of-white-magic/

SWAPNA

But to train our mind, which has been seeking love from outside world from many lives and suddenly to turn it towards the unseen force of love of god, is the most difficult thing to do.

Is there any easy way to surrender to god, or to train our mind which is not used to that process till now?

Naran

How did you learn the alphabets? Was it not difficult at the young age of 4 or 5? Are you still finding it difficult?

Start.

Nothing is easier. There is no short cut.

How do you turn inward?

When there is anger, what we do? We see the person outside, react to what he says and then the altercation starts.

When any emotion is kindled, check yourself from participating. Instead, go within yourself and ask, “Why this anger in me? From where (inside me), it is coming?”

If the physical indication points to me – my hunger and thirst, I immediately satiate my hunger and quench my thirst. Similarly if there is anger in me, I have to release it, instead of inciting it.

Try this with any of your emotions and thoughts. Release anything as and when it arises. Just say, “Can I release this? Say I release this anger…”

Magic mantra – every day, week and month

RD

Referring the article: https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/03/02/moving-to-a-new-location/

I am amazed reading this, as today I was reading old articles of 2009. I was filled with eagerness to learn more and regret that I “wasted” my last four years.

Then I started repeating:

  • “I release my desire to learn more”,
  • “I release regrets of the past”
  • “I accept the present”.

Soon my frame of mind was positive and cheerful again!!

This is a magic mantra. All day now, I repeat this for all things! And finding myself closer and closer to the person I was – before all the stressful life events (happened to me).

From RULE your MIND Workshop notes

1. Release the emotions you felt during the day

Do this exercise for all of them – taking one emotion at a time. Even if it is a positive feeling, release that. Find out the state of the mind and do the steps:

  • “I welcome this state”,
  • “I accept it”
  • “Can I release that?”

Even if it is a negative emotion (or feeling) like anger, you release it.

Whatever that does not go, write it in a notebook and continue to work on it, until it goes.

2. Release emotions felt during the last one week

What are the predominant emotions you had? During last seven days what incidents happened? What emotions you felt?

Welcome each one of them, accept them and release them by keep saying,” I release, I release”.

3. Repeat the exercise for last one month

Are you able to remember any emotions? Are there are any emotion still persisting? When I say emotions, I mean not just negative emotions but also positive emotions.

A SIMPLE technique to make others love you

Before doing anything, before speaking anything, ask yourself, “Will the Divine be happy and bless me if I do this or speak this?”

If you think that the divine will be happy and bless, then you may proceed.

Then you will be loved by one and all.

Why we are doing this exercise?

It makes you to be silent, or to train yourself to be in silence. We cannot know the value of silence.

As you reduce your speech, silence will automatically come. Silence will develop as you stop using unnecessary words.

Lead a Life of No-Karma

The more you try to be silent or reduce your speech you will come out of your karma very easily. The moment you utter a word, you are incurring your karma.

You are not responsible for any word or emotion that is not under your control. If you just say “RELEASE”, the emotion or thought will go.

Instead of doing that, with emotion/thought as your motivating force, if you utter a word or do a thing then you are entering into karma.

When there is conflict or quarrel you have to be very careful in using your words. If we speak unnecessarily it will bounce back on you at a later stage.

(Only here) You should use your analytical mind and restrain from such talks.

The above extract was taken from ‘I Love Myself Workbook’ by Naran S Balakumar

Likes and Dislikes

Naran

How liking for a person operates inside the mind?

Take one person what you like about him and what you don’t like about him, say your spouse for example.

You have a liking for the person. What is the desire operating behind this like?

For some reason you like him. Whoever listens to us we like them. If somebody argues with us, even if they tell the truth we don’t like them.

Therefore, when we like somebody we have to like him for some reason. It could be based on desire for approval or desire to associate.

  • Therefore, shall we say, ‘I release my desire to like him’.

Because we have desire to possess, when that person is around, we feel happy.

When they go away from us, then we do not feel happy and start hating that person.

Did you release the liking for that person? We are not sure, so we are not releasing it.

When you release your likes about a person, everything will go on well between you and the concerned person. Love will get stronger.

  • Release all your likes and dislike for the same person.

How does dislike operates?

If they are like this, then I am happy about them. Thus, a desire to control or change the person operates here.

  • Therefore, welcome your dislike and release your dislike.
  • Then accept your desire to control and release it as well.

Positive vs. Negative thoughts

A thought is a thought. Who says it is positive?

We say so as judging, categorizing, good or bad, likes and dislikes, it is the creation of the human mind.

For the divinity there is no judgment at all. It doesn’t judge that this is positive and that is negative.

So good thought or bad thought, everything has to be released.

Only when you do so, then only you will find what real happiness is. That is Sat Chit Ananda Roopini (goddess of ever-green-joy).

However, even to feel the Sat Chit Anandam (ever-green-joy), one should have the grace of that energy.

Unless we have the grace of the divine, we cannot do any action and move forward in life. At the same time unless we take the action, divine grace will not come. Both are dependent on each other.

We are not doing anything new

There is nothing like past. Analyze your life now. Analyze your emotions and relationships now.

This is what you did in the previous Janma. If you do analyze and release the present situation, that means you are also handling the karma efficiently.

We are not doing anything new. Whatever we have done so far is the continuation of the previous life(s).

Then how to deviate or overlook the karma?

When you start thinking differently about a particular issue then your past life karma will not have any effect on you, because you are going on a different path.

Thinking differently and behaving differently in a situation is very important.

If somebody is having a contrary opinion to you, our normal nature is to resist it or have a judgment about that person. Then how to go about it differently?

It means, “Yes that person is telling his views. I have my own views. I appreciate his views and let him have his views and let me not try to change it either”.

In that manner, you mend your ways and deviate from the past. For each and every behavior, find out how you behaved in the past and deviate from that. Then you are not re-living your past.

Only when you are not reliving your past then only you can create a new future.

That is another subject called as ‘Past-Life Healing’.

Fighting for Happiness and Success

ALAMELU

As you said do not resist allow things to happen!!

How cannot we resist – myself verge of losing job – hubby not yet got job – severe mental stress killing me very badly. How I allow myself not to feel stressed. Please let me know?

Naran

When you are on the verge of losing the job, will your worry or fear get the job back?

If so, have fear and worry.

Your fear and worry or anger is what is known as Resistance.

When you accept what is happening, you may see and utilize other avenues.

A message is received (from the incident why you lost the job).

Instead of being overtaken by the rush of emotions and thoughts, and becoming judgmental about what is happening (which is of no use), go within and watch your reaction.

Say, Yes I accept this emotion. I release this.

Go on releasing whatever thought comes to your mind.

After sometime, analyze why this emotion or these types of thoughts come.

Ask yourself is it because of your desire to change the event?

If the answer is yes, say, I release my desire to control or change what is happening.

Ask another question.

Are all the emotions because of fear?

Whatever we fear will manifest.

Say, releasing this fear, I release my desire for security.

Then when the mind is almost clear of restlessness, start chanting “I accept whatever happens totally”.

Check out the “RELEASE your RESISTANCE” CD, which will help you to release your resistance to find happiness and success in life: http://naranhealingproducts.wordpress.com/2013/04/10/release-your-resistance-cd/

Managing a stubborn person

Student

My son has a resistance to work. He will go late to office. He was warned three times.

One day he decides to go to office in casual wear. Even though I warned him, he didn’t want to listen to me.

Then, I decided to affirm, ‘I release my desire to change or control him’.

Naran

You have affirmed correctly. Please do it as many times as you can.

On and off our mind will not keep quiet. So we need to release our desire to control or change somebody.

Rule your MIND! Rule your LIFE!!

STOP the MIND’s Influence on YOU Part IV

Read part I in the series:  https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/01/31/how-to-stop-the-mind-influencing-us-part-i/

Part II: “The need for Letting GO” – https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/02/07/the-need-for-letting-go/

Part III: “Letting GO in Action”https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/02/11/letting-go-in-action/

Your child is not studying

Letting go proves to be very difficult for the mother.  Between feelings/emotions and action there is no gap. So she gets angry and scolds him.

Then she will feel guilty and pamper him to appease him. During this process, the purpose of the son to study has been lost.

How to manage such a situation?

Whenever any emotion arises, ask the questions:

  • What are the thoughts?
  • What is the emotion behind the thought(s)?
  • I accept this thought
  • Can I release it?

By asking questions, you are creating a gap between thoughts and actions.

Will he study if I release the thought? He has not studied so far anyway.

Try this technique, release your anger and do the action. Then see the results for yourself whether he studies or not.

Why there are communication barriers between mother and son?

Emotions block the communication.

What is the communication required here? He has to listen to us for him to study.

There can be three types of desires here.

Desire to control or change the person

He has to study very hard. He has to become an Engineer and so on.

A framework is present here:

  • Release the thought one after another
  • Do I want to change this person/child?
  • If I say yes, can I release my desire to control the person?
  • We are only releasing the desire, and we are not releasing the action here.
  • I release my desire to control the person. Only then your anger will go.

Desire for more security – feeling of insecurity

Is there is any desire to feel more secure?

Only if he studies well he will do well and then I will become free.

Where there is fear there is no presence of Divinity. Only Satan is present.

I release my fear.

These desires are born with ego.

Desire for approval

Others should recognize my son’s talent. Others should appreciate us (by appreciating my son’s excellence in his studies). People have to complement us (how well you have brought him up).

Another example where a husband desires his wife should treat him properly when he comes home from office.

Release that desire.

What if she appreciates you or not? You let go the craving for recognition.

More and more you should indulge in releasing thoughts, like a game.

Rule your mind instead of mind ruling you

Now mind is managing your life.

Instead, manage it yourself.

Then you do not need a teacher. You do not need anybody.

Therefore, just let go all the thoughts.

What this technique can do

  • Achieving your goals. We are not saying no for achievement. We are only entitled for action and not fruits for the action.
  • Keep saying release and go beyond likes and dislikes.
  • Decision-making
  • Breaking bad habits
  • Better Health and Wealth
  • Good Relationships
  • Build better parent and children relationships
  • In your career you will be able to do wonders

In entire life, you can let go and release. Everything will happen without your intervention.

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