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Do this! Problems will be solved automatically!!

Naran

Desire for approval in action

You can list the ways you seek desire for approval:

  • Thank you for your appreciation
  • I don’t want to hurt his feelings
  • I should not reject him
  • If I do this, he will be happy
  • If I do this, he will not get angry

In addition, list the ways by which you allow yourself to be controlled by others or control others – Desire for approval.

You can term it as fear of rejection or disapproval, for example to influence others through Batch Flower Remedies (list this item too).

We have so much desire to control others and events. We use Bach Flower remedies either with a desire to change ourselves or others.

70% of the time we are operating with this desire and may be more, but not less. If we release this desire, most of the problems will be solved by itself!!

Does a person control you?

Naran

He is controlling me. If you think A is trying to control you, then it means you have fear of being controlled.

  • Release the fear of being controlled

Can you release the fear to be controlled?

Why A is controlling you? It is because you have the fear of being controlled.

  • Before releasing the fear welcome it and then accept it.

Whenever he controls you, are you resisting him?

  • Accept your resistance to him and release it.

Do you like to change him?

  • If yes, can you release the desire to change him?

What do you dislike in him?

  • Can you let go this dislike?

You may ask a different question.

What is that you disapprove, or reject/dislike in him?

Can you accept him as he is? If you get “No” then continue the exercise. You will not get an immediate yes, as you have dislikes for him.

Does this person cause fear in you? What will happen if you are standing in front of him? Is there is any feeling of insecurity?

  • Release your feelings of insecurity.
  • Release your feelings of him.

What do you think will happen if you are in front of him? Do you want this fear to happen?  If no, then release it.

  • Can you release this wanting to happen?
  • Release your fear.

How do you protect yourself? Do you show your anger? Do you resist him? Alternatively, do you have the desire to separate from him or go away from him?

  • Release all those desires.

Can you now accept the person as he is? If you get ‘No”, then continue the exercise. Can you have trust in him? Does anyone think that he or she cannot accept him as he is?

Please understand, if you cannot accept him, then he will continue to be in these types of situations. If you do not want to quarrel or lose harmony, you can nullify the charge of emotions by accepting him as he is.

Related Blog

I love to take control of my life: http://wp.me/ptUMq-4D

Do you know why you react negatively?

Naran

Even though you are successful in your career…!!!

By nature, you are pure – positive, fearless, loving etc. In that sense, all of us are united at a level – called as Sub-conscious Mind or Universal Mind, where we have access to this positive energy.

At this level we are perfect, can do anything we want and be anything we would like to be.

However, we bring in the energy of negativity from outside. Thus, fear, anger, hatred etc., comes from outside and not inside us.

Then, how to get rid of the part that you don’t want?

Affirm:

“I RELEASE the part that produces anger”.

“I OPEN and ALIGN WITH the part that activates love, and forgiveness”.

Attend the workshop on 19th Oct, to know more about your shadow self: http://wp.me/p31KXo-1Y

Stop thinking negative

Rhythm

I noticed that you always say that our conscious mind always has a tendency to create that what we don’t want.

Then how we can stop it, as we can’t stop thinking about our needs and desires?

If we think negative then it often creates it. Why then we wish positive when it doesn’t happen?

Naran

Just say, “I release this thought” as and when any thought arises.

If you have a desire, release that and work towards that desire.

Don’t think about the result while you are working towards your goal.

Accept whatever comes as results whether you wanted it or not:

  1. When you have got what you desired, then PRAY for others – who are denied and/or whose desires were unfulfilled.
  2. When you have not got what you desired, THANK the DIVINE for giving it to someone, who needed most.

React! But Release First!!

Deepa

Refer the blog: http://dare2doit.wordpress.com/2013/03/15/typical-indian-mentality/

You will say neutral. I say balanced.

One lady called mummy said nasty things about you on blog and I was aghast for a few minutes.

I did your rule “exercise”.

Later, saw coolly how you tackle everything and everyone!!

Naran

In fact, before replying to Mummy, I did the same.

I am glad you have done it too.

Please read the blog, I have written based on the action I took after I read Mummy’s comments: http://healbybachflowers.wordpress.com/2013/03/15/denying-pleasures/

This is the message I want to give it for one and all:

  1. We are entitled to act and not react.
  2. Release your emotions, beliefs, and thoughts as well as the desires operating behind them and then act.
  3. This way your actions will not be based on past memories, but on reality.

Moving to a new location

Let us say, you want to come to Chennai.

Release your likes about Chennai then only you can come to Chennai.

  • I release my likes for Chennai.

I like Chennai because of my liking to Hotel Saravana Bavan and Marina Beach in Chennai.

I accept my liking for Chennai.

Then, I release my liking for Chennai.

  • I release my dislikes for Chennai.

I dislike Chennai, because of auto drivers, and it is very dirty.

What’s the desire that operates here?

There is a desire to control and to change it. For example, we say, ‘If I am given power, I will change it in no time’.

Here, we are only releasing the desires (or dislikes).

Likewise you can do the same when you are moving to a foreign country.

Release both your likes and dislikes related about a situation you wanted to change.

Failed to change my child’s behaviour

You want to control your child’s behavior. Instead of studying, he is watching the TV all the time.

  • First say, “I release my desire to control him”. Then advise him.

Why? If you tell him anything with judgment, then he will never listen to you for sure.

How do we control our children? They have to be punctual, eat healthy, study well etc.

Thus, we control all their activities because we think they are to be corrected. We don’t allow them to grow in their own way.

  • What will happen if we don’t tell them so?

If I don’t tell him then he won’t go to school.

  • There is a fear he won’t go to school.
  • So I release the fear that he won’t go to school.
  • What will happen if he doesn’t go to school? Nothing will happen.

I have a responsibility as a mother. Other people should say that my child is a good child.

  • Say, “I release my desire for approval”.
  • In addition, say, “I release my desire to control him”.
  • Release all the desires and then discipline him.
  • There are three basic desires that are operating within us – desire to control, desire to get approval and desire for security.

Even if I wake him up, he doesn’t get up.

  • How do you exercise your control with him? By getting angry with him, you are exercising your control over him.
  • Release that.
  • What’s that you don’t like about him? You dislike him because he is getting up late.
  • Release your dislikes about him.

He doesn’t behave as per my expectations. If he gets up on time then he will be no 1 student

  • This is your expectation.
  • Release all your expectations about him  and then you discipline him

Each and every matter you need to analyze like this and then take your actions. 

The need for Letting GO

STOP the MIND’s Influence on YOU Part II

Read the first part of the article here: https://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2013/01/31/how-to-stop-the-mind-influencing-us-part-i/

Letting go the thoughts

How can we do it that?

How thoughts can be let off?

There will be resistance inside the mind to do so, as it does not want us to move forward spiritually in life.

Letting go seen inside our body

Is this letting go is something new that we have never seen?

If you watch your body, it is letting go. However, mind does not do that.

Let say you like eating Jangri (Indian sweet). Can you keep it in the mouth for long? It has to be released to the stomach. After digestion, if the stomach does not release it, then you have to go to hospital. Nature of the mouth is to let go.

Stomach has to let go to intestines. If intestines refuse to let go, imagine what will happen to us. Here cooperation among body organs is a must.

Jangri takes different forms in the end, losing its original form after digestion, absorption and elimination operations of the digestive tract.

Skin let go by sweating. Lungs exhales carbon dioxide. If heart stops circulating blood one-tenth of a second, then you will die. It does letting in and letting out blood.

Letting go action in nature

Morning has to go for noon to come and afternoon goes for evening to come. Letting go happens in a circular manner. Similarly, sun goes, and Moon comes.

Letting go is the process of nature. However, for mind it’s not possible. It does opposite of it, by holding on to things.

Holding on is the nature of the mind

Mind is the enemy to Body and Soul.

When you hold on to a thought, it means there is stagnation. Then you will have less of Prana (energy). Mind is always stagnated.

One door closes Another door opens

Tanu

I and my boy-friend broke up last year though we love each other even now.

It all happened because of his friends as they cropped up misunderstandings between us. And he isn’t able to see that.

And I know he doesn’t have that much of courage to tell me that he still loves me. I really want to get back together with him.

Naran

Leave him!!!

Tanu

Then please suggest me something so that I forget him easily as I am trying to get over him. But, as we work at the same place, it’s really difficult for me to see him every time everywhere around me and that turns me off.

And I am full of sad feelings.

Or tell me how I can get my real soul mate.

Naran

I could understand your pangs of love.

Only for your highest good I suggested that.

I honestly feel that you should lead a happy life.

Can everybody be happy?

One has to learn to be happy in spite of events.

When we want something intently, and when we resist what is happening then what we get is pain. Though we want pleasure, our resistance to any event and our incomplete understanding of the divine order, gives us pain only.

Just observe what is going on in the mind.

  • As and when any thought come, just say, “Why not I release this? Yes, I let go of this thought?”
  • Release everything – every feeling, every thought – that prevents you to forget him.
  • If any thought or feeling does not get released, find out the desire behind this feeling or thought. If there is a desire to possess him release that desire.
  • If there is a desire to change him or the event release that desire too.

Do the releasing techniques as given above.

Other steps

If you can buy Bach flower remedies from your local homeopathy shop then buy:

  • CHICORY (to overcome the love pangs)
  • WALNUT (to release resistance and break away )
  • WILLOW (to overcome resentment and anger towards friends)
  • HORNBEAM (to move on)

Take those flower remedies by putting 6 pills of each in a bottle of water and keep on sipping that water from morning to evening.

Do this sipping for 15 days.

Put the pills once every day.

 

Obsession Will Not Make It Happen

Naran

If you are obsessed of anything, it may not happen. I want you to change your mind-set and be relaxed.

Oli

I am always scared of losing my love. I know I became obsessed and I really try to be relaxed and leave it to divine.

However, I get impatient as I lost my first love like this.  That’s why I think it is going to happen again.

Naran

Whenever you get the fear just say within, “Why this fear”?

The mind always has a tendency to think and feel as it did in the past.

The event may be new. The feelings and thoughts are never new. The same feelings and the same thoughts are produced every day.

As long as we think that we are mute spectators of events, we cannot do anything.

You are not your mind. When it produces some feeling or thought, which you don’t like, you have the ability to release it.

When a feeling arises, or when a thought comes out, just say:

  •          Can I release this thought?
  •          Why should I keep this thought?
  •          Is this thought helping me or hindering me?
  •          If it hinders me, can I release it?
  •          If the answer is “yes” say, “I release this thought.”

Say this as many times as possible so that you are out of the fear.

This method will help you come out of fear.

Fear always manifests what you don’t want in life.

Oli

You have told me not to be obsessed and to relax. But how can I able to know my limits? Can’t I have right to express my feeling? Can’t I pray or try to regain my lost harmony between us?

I am chanting mantras with full faith on divine. How can I know that there is still a hope? Because we are neither astrologer nor we can talk to divine.

I am going to say my feeling to him tomorrow after chanting OM CHAM NAMAHA OM JAM NAMAHA.

Naran

When you are obsessed with worry and fear you are breaking the quantum rules.

Your fear will manifest the one which you don’t want, instead of getting what you want.

Desire something. Quieten your mind, relax and release it to the divine field.

Approaching anything with the calm and relaxed mind has got better chance of getting what we want.

How to remain calm and relaxed?

That is where the surrendering attitude enters. By surrendering the desire to the divine field, you accept what the divine offers. Surrendering makes you think that whatever divine offer is good for me.

 

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